The Pub Discussion Board

Eric Storm · 2009-10-12 18:36:34

1. Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?

2. Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?

3. If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?

4. If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words?

5. Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?

6. Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing?

7. Why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing?

8. Why do "tug" boats push their barges?

9. Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game" when we are already there?

10. Why are they called "stands" when they are made for sitting?

11. Why is it called "after dark" when it really is "after light"?

12. Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected?

13. Why are a "wise man" and a "wise guy" opposites?

14. Why do "overlook" and "oversee" mean opposite things?

15. Why is "phonics" not spelled the way it sounds?

16. If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?

17.. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

18. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

19. If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?

20. Why is bra singular and panties plural?

21. Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control when you know the batteries are dead?

22. Why do we put suits in garment bags and garments in a suitcase?

23. How come abbreviated is such a long word?

24. Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?

25. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

26. Why do they call it a TV set when you only have one?

27. Christmas - What other time of the year do you sit in front of a dead tree and eat candy out of your socks?

28. Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway ?

29. Why is toilet paper tiny squares and tissues big squares?

3dbig_smile

Nadez · 2009-10-13 09:01:53

Holy crow Eric did you write these out yourself? totally cool, I cant wait to send this to a friend

Eric Storm · 2009-10-13 17:32:55

No, I did not. I found them on another website. I have heard some of them before, in other places.

Eric

Nadez · 2009-10-14 08:01:43

I like the bath towels one, its quite inventive and it does make a bit of sense..why DO we wash them if were clean when we use them

Eric Storm · 2009-10-15 00:04:09

Do the words "dead skin cells" ring a bell?

Eric

Nadez · 2009-10-22 05:20:57

*cough* yes, I knew that I was simply trying to make you think! still its quite funny, I wonder if I could trick anyone with that, I guess i,ll have to find people with MY caliber of intelligence instead of all you Genius level people

lordalpha · 2009-10-23 21:17:03

As much as I try, I cannot keep from thinking that the only people that are dumb enough to believe that Nadez, were the same people who tried to have "Technology" taken out of the current Curriculum for a humanities class called Tech, and Society. I don't mean technology in a vague way, I mean the actual word...they were arguing that Tech is a shorter, more efficient way to express that, and it should be utilized(the head of this small "push" was the same one who objected to reading 2-5 pages a week between classes)

Bd.Carlo · 2009-11-09 08:04:08

thats good, and here is a similar, but different one.

English is really crazy

There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins were not invented in England or French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies, while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat. We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square, and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write, but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce, and hammers don't ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So, one moose, 2 meese? One index, two indices? Is cheese the plural of choose?

If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

In what language do people recite at a play, and play at a recital?

Ship by truck, and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell? Park on driveways and drive on parkways? How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? How can the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as hell another?

When a house burns up, it burns down. You fill in a form by filling it out, and an alarm clock goes off by going on.

When the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible. And why, when I wind up my watch, I start it, but when I wind up this essay, I end it.

LAoW · 2009-11-09 22:19:19

Bravo, Bd.Carlo! And what do humanitarians eat? Food. 3dsmile

unknown1000u2 · 2009-11-10 12:37:34

Why do we need a hot water heater?
Why is it that, when you bounce a check, the bank charges more of what they already know you don't have any of anyway?
Why do we need a permanent press setting on an iron?

The Pub Discussion Board

#1 2009-10-12 18:36:34

Imponderables...

#2 2009-10-13 09:01:53

Re: Imponderables...

#3 2009-10-13 17:32:55

Re: Imponderables...

#4 2009-10-14 08:01:43

Re: Imponderables...

#5 2009-10-15 00:04:09

Re: Imponderables...

#6 2009-10-22 05:20:57

Re: Imponderables...

#7 2009-10-23 21:17:03

Re: Imponderables...

#8 2009-11-09 08:04:08

Re: Imponderables...

#9 2009-11-09 22:19:19

Re: Imponderables...

#10 2009-11-10 12:37:34

Re: Imponderables...

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