The Pub Discussion Board

Haha

who the hell comes up with this crap (its funny though)

Another amusing link!!!

Wait until all the pics load, though. I kinda' like the last one.

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/pictures/view/80514287/

HAHAHA!!! Too cute!

This one is even better:

A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife. She was a very good-looking woman and determined to keep the ranch, but knew very little about ranching, so she decided to place an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand.

Two cowboys applied for the job. One was gay and the other a drunk. She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied she decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the house than the drunk. He proved to be a
hard worker who put in long hours every day and knew a lot about ranching.

For weeks, the two of them worked, and the ranch was doing very well. Then one day, the rancher's widow said to the hired hand, 'You have done a really good job, and the ranch looks great. You should go into town and kick up your heels. The hired hand readily agreed and went into town one Saturday night. One o'clock came, however, and he didn't
return. Two o'clock and no hired hand. Finally he returned around two-thirty, and upon entering the room, he found the rancher's widow sitting by the fireplace with a glass of
wine, waiting for him.

She quietly called him over to her. 'Unbutton my blouse and take it off,' she said. Trembling, he did as she directed. 'Now take off my boots.' He did as she asked, ever so slowly. 'Now take off my socks.' He removed each gently and placed them neatly by her boots. 'Now take off my skirt.' He slowly unbuttoned it, constantly watching her eyes in the fire light. 'Now take off my bra.' Again, with trembling hands, he did as he was told and dropped it to the floor. Then she looked at him and said, 'If you ever wear my clothes into town again, you're fired.'

Two medical students were walking along the street when they saw an old man walking with his legs spread apart. He was stiff legged and walking slowly.
One of the students said to his friend: "I'm sure the poor old man has Petry Syndrome.
Those people walk just like that."
The other student says: "No, I don't think so. The old man surely has Zovitzki Syndrome.
He walks slowly and his legs are apart just as we learned in class."
Since they couldn't agree they decided to ask the old man.
They approached him and one of the students said to him: "We're medical students and couldn't help but notice the way you walk, but we couldn't agree on the syndrome you might have. Could you tell us what it is?"
The old man said: "I'll tell you, but first you must tell me what you two fine medical students think."
One of the students said: "I think it's Petry Syndrome."
The old man said: "You thought....... But you are wrong."
Then the other student said: "I think you have Zovitzki Syndrome."
The old man said: "You thought........ But you are wrong."
So they asked him: "Well, old timer, what do you have?"
The old man said: "I thought it was GAS........... But I was wrong!"

Something I found a while ago on the 'net


THERMODYNAMICS OF HELL?

The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid term. The answer by one student was so “profound” that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.
BONUS QUESTION: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle’s Law; (gas cools off when it expands and heats up when it is compressed) or some variant.
One student however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate that souls are moving into Hell and the rate they are leaving at. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave.  Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, lets look at the different religions that exist in the world today.  Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there are more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially.
Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle’s Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume in Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.
That gives two possibilities:
1.    If hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2.    Of course, if Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Ms Teresa Banyan during my freshman year: “...that it would be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you.” and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then #2 cannot be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and will not freeze.

The student received the only “A” given